Dear Kabbalists,

I’m really getting tired of your propaganda.  You take things that already exist, repackage them, and then market them as something special.  Since your relgion “organization” is based in Jewish mysticism, which is based in Judaism, and I am Jewish, you are making us look weirder than the Hasidim already do, and I wish that you would stop.  I have no issue with your existence, I have an issue with your weirdness and the fact that calling dog shit “Kabbalah dog shit,” does not mean it is “mystical,” nor does it justify charging 5 times the price.  Now someone is selling Kabbalah Vodka, and bragging about the fact that it is the old Russian Vodka recipe.  Great, maybe you should repackage Coca Cola,  write some stuff from the Torah on the bottle,  and use their original recipe too.  Vodka and the Torah have nothing to do with one another.  Jews don’t believe in Hell, but I promise you that you’re all going there.   Maybe there is no Hell, maybe it’s just a Heaven that looks like Madison Avenue, coupled with the universe’s most fabulous cuisines, and you’re all dammed to brokeness.  That’ll show you.

Source: Born Rich