Cool Married Guys Vol. 3 – Mike Delfin

For the last 5 years or so, I’ve almost known Mike D.   On more than one occasion a party flyer hosted by the “Delfin Brothers” would some how find it’s way into my life, but as a bit of a home body, I’m not sure I ever attended. I’ve hung out with his brother Benny on numerous occasions, and even did a joint birthday party this year, but never once have we ever officially met, until now.   An avid CMG fan, and an official Cool Married Guy, I now present “Mike D.- photographer, entrepreneur, husband, father, renaissance man, cool married guy.”

State your name: Michael Delfin aka Mike D.

Where are you from and where do you live now?: I was born and raised in Reading, PA. It’s a small city NW of Philly. I owe a lot of who I am to growing up there.   It’s a blue collar town where people say what they think. There used to be a lot of textile and steel factories but now there’s just a lot of joblessness and poverty (currently tied for 6th in the country with Flint, MI). I currently live in Clinton Hill, Brooklyn.

Quite a bit different from the rotten apple.  So what brought you here?: I first moved to New York in August 2001 to go to NYU. Shortly thereafter, September 11th happened and being downtown in a blocked off neighborhood, I would often escape to my older brother’s house in Brooklyn to relax and get away from the anxiety of Manhattan and the smoke that drifted uptown. I loved how relaxed and neighborhoody it was, especially compared to the dorm on Washington Square where I was living. As soon as the year was over I met some friends who had similar feelings about BK and we moved to Williamsburg. I stayed for a year and then went to Flatbush for 2 years and have been in Clinton Hill for the last 5 years.

Nice, so what’s your story ?: I studied photography at NYU my freshman year. It’s a nice school and all but a tremendous rip-off in terms of getting skills you need to make dough once you leave. After my first year I transferred to the School of Visual Arts and graduated from there in 2005 with a BFA.

Interesting. Seems like SVA would be a better fit for all things creative?: SVA was a great school. The professors there are all working in various fields of photography and were able to bring their experiences to the class. I had an editorial photography class with Sarah Friedman who’s a dope photog who has shot tons of covers and ads, and she inspired me to go the magazine route.

So how did you get your foot in the door?: I interned for Danielle Levitt, another big shot photographer who really taught me the nitty-gritty of the editorial photography business. After my internship with her, I stayed on to be her studio manager which basically meant I handled the daily activities of her studio, photo requests, print orders, client relations, emails, etc. At the same time I was interning for Andrea Buman who was the photo editor of the once great KING Magazine (R.I.P.). I loved working at KING and not just because of the models they shot every month, but working in a magazine office really shows you that you don’t really have to grow up if you don’t want to. So having had experience on both the magazine and photographer side, I felt prepared to go out into the world as a freelance photographer. I shot for various magazines including Trader Monthly which is mostly white business men, KING which is rappers, athletes, and ladies, School Sports which at the time had access to all of the top-notch high school athletes,  SLAM which is NBA and college basketball players and SCRATCH, which is mag for Hip-Hop producers and rappers.  Shooting portraits of so many different types of people is a great job.  It allows you to peer into so many different peoples’ lives and see how they live before you go back to your own.   And you get access to great places.
That’s quite a resume sir. You must have had a lot of crazy experiences in the mag world?: Once I was shooting Leandro Barbosa (Phoenix Suns) for SLAM at the Garden after a Knicks/Suns game. I got to run around the entire arena with my assistant, scouting for locations without any problems and then hang out with the whole Suns team after the game, while they waited for the bus to take them to the airport.

Sounds pretty awesome, especially if you’re into basketball. I have to believe you had some fun with the rappers?: Photographing 50 Cent at his Connecticut Mansion was a fun shoot. We were only allowed inside the house to take a piss, but we got to see all of his cars and bikes in his garages, meet his dogs and his security, and Funkmaster Flex was hanging out too because he was doing an interview for ESPN. When 50 came outside him and Flex were riding 4-wheelers around and washing his cars, horsing around.

Crazy! Any favorite shoots?: My favorite “celebrity” shoot ever was when I shot Jim Jones for Mass Appeal. This was before “Ballin’” so he wasn’t a big time rapper quite yet. We met at a midtown spa and he let me take pictures of him while he got a facial. Jim Jones in a spa robe with green goop drippin’ off of his face?!? Instant classic

Hey man, maybe it was your pictures that made him a star?! And correct me if I’m wrong but you worked at XXL too right?: When my first daughter was born, I wanted to find a part-time job to supplement my freelance work so I started working as the photo assistant at XXL Magazine. As the economy started slowing down I decided to take a full time job as the #2 photo editor there. Once the economy completely tanked, they laid off half of the staff , including my boss, and I became the Photo Editor.

Sounds like a great opportunity: It was a great opportunity. I organized every photo shoot and got to meet tons of rappers I idolized as a kid. My two favorite shoots were going down to Miami to shoot Rick Ross for my first cover, which I did not shoot, but the great Jonathan Mannion did, and my final cover and final shoot for XXL,: Jay-Z right before BP3 came out. I don’t usually turn into super fan when I meet these guys, but Jay-Z is the GOD MC. Hanging out in a photo studio with just him a few others was an experience I’ll never forget.

Man if you only knew my feelings on “Great Hova.” Another conversation for another day. So how long have you been married?:
I have been married for 3 years to my beautiful wife Tree.   She has a film degree from Pratt but is multi-talented in various mediums.  She is the real creative genius in our family and a great mother.  We got married in 2006 shortly after finding out we were pregnant.  It was not a shotgun wedding by any means but rather we were in love and knew we had a good thing so we dove in.

So how has marriage changed you?: I think the comfort of knowing that you have your best friend and partner frees you up to do things you have always wanted to do and makes you a supremely more confident person. Marriage has also made me think about how my actions affect other people much more. As any married person can tell you, you really learn how to compromise and say sorry quickly and this has helped me in my career as well as my other relationships with friends and family.

And you have 2 children?: I have two daughters, Ruby who just turned 3 and Juna who was born on October 21st.

Congrats man! How have the birth of your children changed you?: Jesus, I don’t even really remember who I was before I had kids.  Truthfully I think having kids is the fulfillment of your biological duties on this planet and so once you have children, everything else falls into place. For me everything became so much simpler. I used to worry about all kinds of things when I was single that just don’t matter anymore. I think single people have a lot of anxiety because they have so much time to think about everything. If you’re taking care of someone else’s needs from 6am to 8pm it focuses you in a way that I never expected, and not to mention makes you enjoy that sweet sweet free-time, if you ever get any. Everything is about the family, the kids, and keeping them happy and safe. I work every minute of the day to make sure my daughters are happy kids and grow up in a positive way.

Wow, almost makes me want to have…..ok not quite yet, but what do you think is particularly “cool” about married life?: If you’re in a good marriage, the confidence that you get from feeling loved and loving someone back is priceless.

Preach! So how in the world did you go from XXL to owning your own daycare?: Well the magazine business sucks right now (as you read this online), and magazines were tanking left and right. XXL is still there but I could see the shrinking budgets and stressed out staff meant that even if the magazine stayed alive, it was not going to be a fun place to work anymore. My wife had been working on opening a daycare for a minute. She used to work in a children’s boutique in the neighborhood on Saturdays for extra dough, and parents would come in all the time desperate for a preschool for their kids. We got the idea that she would be a great teacher and started looking into how to start it. The bureaucratic red tape stretches for miles in this city, as it should when children are involved, and as things progressed I started thinking about what I really wanted to do. I worked in a windowless office in Manhattan and commuted an hour each way every day. I wanted to be with my family, not sit in front of a computer all day and see the sunshine once in a while. I floated the idea of teaching at the school to my wife and she loved it. I quit and we opened the daycare in September. We are completely full and have a long waiting list.

So any crazy stories from the world of daycare? Perhaps any that rival hanging out with gangsta rappers?: Oooohh, I can’t touch that one yet if I want to stay in business. Let me just say that spending all day everyday with 2 and 3 year olds is the most fun I’ve ever had at a job but also the hardest I’ve ever worked.

Fair enough. So are you totally done with photography? : I’m not ever going to be done with photography and to be honest, not doing it for work has been a blessing for me creatively. Photography is now a fun outlet for me and not how I feed my family and so I can fully enjoy it. When I was a working photographer I didn’t take as many photos of my family either, you know “the shoemaker’s kids go barefoot.” Now I spend much more time documenting our life which I know we will all appreciate later in life.

You definitely have a point there. So would you say all of your energy pretty much focused on the daycare now, or are you working on any creative endeavors?: My wife and I have books of endeavors we would like to get into, but having a 3 year old, a baby and a business takes up every waking minute, and probably will for years to come. Because we had children fairly young (both 23), we fully plan on reverting to 20somethings in our 40s when our kids are grown.

Well you know, “40’s the new 20.” So how can people find your photography work and info on the daycare?: You can go to littlenestbrooklyn.com for school info and my personal website is mikednyc.com.

All photos copyright Michael Delfin 2009. All photos provided are for one-time use only and not to be republished or resold anywhere, anytime in any format.